Writing about myself
"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you"
This might surprise you, but I occasionally struggle with writing about myself. It is not that I am afraid to disclose my thoughts and emotions. It’s more a feeling of discomfort when taking center stage. When being looked at. I rather stay in the background and try not to draw too much attention to my person. Or to my running.
Although I’m aware of my storytelling skills, I don’t find myself to be a very exciting topic. Especially not as a runner. To be fair, I am a pretty average runner. The things I do in running have been done thousands of times before. Even running Western States. My biggest running goals are another runner’s warm-up workouts. Although I know that it’s also the other way around. Yet still, I do not strive to being admired. Especially not in an athletic context. If I was forced to choose, I’d rather have someone think about me:
"Oh, he’s really funny!"
then
"Oh, he’s really fast!"
Truth is, I am neither of both.
I understand that writing a book about a very personal running experience is quite inconsistent, if you actually want to remain in the background as a person. In my defense, writing Runhundred was nothing that I had planned. It rather just happened. I did, however, make a conscious decision about #how I wanted to write it.
There many methods to deviate the attention from your person when writing a book. An obvious one is to write a handbook or companion. Giving tipps and tricks allows you to hide behind them and just show as much or as little (or nothing at all) of yourself as you wish.
Another option is to write about others and their heroic deeds. As the author, you’re still the one who interprets and projects visible words and actions. In that way, you can share some of your own values and opinions, but you’re never gonna be fully tangible to the reader.
The third and most common method is to write an insubstantial “Been there, done that” type of text. A report style narration describing the What and How in great detail, but thoroughly ignoring the delicate and revealing Why.
Writing Runhundred, I have chosen none of these protection mechanisms. I wanted to share my entire story and do it in the most personal, open and genuine way possible. All shields down. Vulnerable and exposed.
I truly believe that the best stories are the truthful ones. Or to put it in the words of Ernest Hemingway:
"All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know.”
After all, writing is not about the writer, but rather about the stories themselves and the experiences they represent. Creating a strong bond with everyone who reads your words and feels them.
Everything not running
Did I ever tell you about the Burger Club? No? Then I’ll make it today’s Everything not running topic.
Friendships are a weird thing. Most of them come and also go during a lifetime. Paths separate, interests diverge, and every so often it just doesn’t “fit” anymore. Often friends become amicable acquaintances. Sometimes we lose touch completely. And that’s alright.
However, with a little bit of work (quite similar to working on your romantic relationship), friendships have a good chance of lasting forever. That’s the direction we’re heading with the Burger Club.
The Burger Club is a small circle of friends, namely Martin, Christian, Matthias and me, founded in Munich sometime in the early 2000s. In our twenties, we met once a month to eat - you guessed it - burgers. One person also had to host the Burger Club and was responsible for excessive quantities of burger buns, vegan patties, pickles, ketchup, and fries. The average BPP (Burger per person) was 5 and on some glorious nights we frenetically celebrated a 6th, even a 7th burger. We had occasional guest appearances but the hard core always stayed the same.
Well, the Burger Club still exists today. We just met yesterday. While we have settled on a more or less quarterly meet-up rhythm and diversified our meals a bit (with an occasional hamburger revival, like last night), the line-up is still the same.
It is common rituals and diehard consistency that make our friendship so long-lasting. I am proud of this. And I am looking forward to many more Burger Club reunions in the future.
